Is this what I am really looking for afterall?

ASSALAMUALAIKUM WBT :)

20th April, there is a human was born with the sole purpose of bringing people to revert back to Tawheed, he was our Holy Prophet, Muhammad SAW. In the same month, I was born to a loving family, in a suburb area somewhere in Kelantan. Erik Erikson ( the Freudian psychologist), theorized that now I'm 22, I'm moving out of the 5th phase of life he termed 'Identity Vs Role Confusion'. I never did have a full idea on what he meant, but well, I guess what he tried to say is that by now, I'm supposed to have my own real identity, or else I will end up having confusion about my roles in life!

Have I've found my identity?

Guess so...There is some days in the past, I can say that I spent my lifetime pondering upon questions of identity. I was more concerned about what I appear to be in the eyes of the others instead of what I real;y feel I am. In the words of Natasha Beddingfield: " The slightest remark would embark me on a journey of self-doubt". I can still remember how I used to get angry, hurt, tell me no, or give me some other form of disapproval. But I did learn a lot from those days, I gave myself a break. I reminded myself that even in a landslide election victory in which candidate secures 55% of the vote, he/she is left with 45% of the population that wishes someone else were the winner. Pretty humbling, is it?

The point is: This is my life. It's a brief candle. I won't spend  it trying to be what other people want me to be. The question I should be asking right now is: " Am I who I wanna be?"

Things that I am thankful for in Year 2011

when a door is closed, a new one opens.

So, it's the last day of the year. It's a cliche, but that is how time flies.  Fast!. tomorrow I unofficially will be 22. Yet to be confirmed 22 on my birthday. Some people label it as 3-years to a Quarter-Life. I can say that I have been through a wealth of experience, ranging from one extreme to another (good and bad), to make who I am today. I believe the things  that define us are the things that we love to do. For me it is always about  writing and making new friends. As for my passion for writing, it has brought this so called ' Bits of Bytes' to gain relatively wide readership, especially thinking that my blog is not that sensational with the latest gossips or gadgets. It's just about my life. I am thankful that people read the things I wanted to share. 

Internship wise, I am thankful that until now I have learnt so many new things in term of Oil and Gas Operation though my background is not aligned well with the department that I am attached to. It is indeed a blessing,because I know surely there is something payable will be waiting for me in the future. Plus, I am near to half-way through, it's already 3 months passed and I hope I will keep the pace up and ace my internship :) If I can make it through this term, I believe I have equipped myself be more ready than ever to face the future challenges of my career.

To mark the end of this year as well, there are two babies of my sisters, a niece Nurul Najwa Liyana Bt Muhaizan and a nephew Muhd Azim B Azizul to be welcomed on board :) and to add more, my adorable younger sister, Nuranis Ainma got 9As for her PMR. She brings a proud to my family especially for my mom and dad. Their investment really paid off.

However, not everything goes perfectly well this year. In the middle of year, one of my teacher had passed away due to cervical cancer. Reaching to the end of 2011, I had been receiving 3 bad news for three weeks consecutively. My beloved senior, Muhd Syahrul  Yusof who was my senior in my high school passed away due to the accident, followed by my UTP clique, Mohamad Saufi Sulaiman who was also got involve in accident and he was in comma and alhamdulillah now he is improving though very slow, and lastly again one of my senior has been called back to meet Allah due to leukemia. Hopefully, we will be meeting again in Jannah. Insha Allah.

All in all, 2011 will be a year I will always remember. Goodbye 2011, you have been a great teacher. Welcome 2012, whatever you may bring, I am ready!

Cook all your worries

Assalamualaikum wbt :)

Great courage comes not from feeling great while everything goes well. The greatest courage comes when you feel great despite constantly being tested or running through a complicated situation. What is courage if we do nothing much to test it? It is the ability to cultivate a mind that stays calm in the middle of the storm which is much coveted by those who wish to become great. while so many things are running through the mind, many imagined the worst thing that could happen. However, have you noticed that most of the things that you worry about in the past didn't actually happen? Worry is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but gets you nowhere. All worry does is elicit unpleasant emotions and hinders you from truly enjoying the present moment. The future is uncertain, so live in the present, live the moment as it occurs to you. Take control of your worry and feelings, because if you don't, it is possible to go sightseeing in Paris and still be depressed. Take control and you might feel happy just walking through your home garden.

I am not suggesting you to ignore all the troubles that might be looming in the future. I am just asking you not to ruminate about it again and again in your conscious mind. Put it in the back of your mind and solve it when the time comes. I don't have much experience in cooking, but i know that there is such term as 'slow-cooking' using the oven. I have observed chefs in cooking shows put some of their stuff in the oven, let it slow cook and sort of forget about it for a while until the time where the timer comes off. While waiting, the chef would tend to other things that needs present attention like cutting and frying. Uncertain problems that might occur in the future, instead of being tended to as in frying, should be let in the oven to 'slow-cook', while the current things in the present should be attended with your attention. It is not ignoring, it is putting in the back of your mind and live your daily life paying attention to the present. If it helps, put it on a note to remind you, and let it be. You are not procrastinating but letting time find solutions to your problems. You will be surprised that as you live your day, solutions will come from the most unexpected sources. The great thing about putting it in the back of your mind or your 'oven' is that the problems or issues will slow cook and by the time you get it out, it is cooked, or you might already have the solution to the problems.

Weird analogy, indeed I know. Especially from a person like me who doesn't cook. But that's what got into my mind as I watched cooking channels. So, cook all your worries, and live your life in the present!

For what we know; Time & Tide wait for no men

ASSALAMUALAIKUM WBT :)

It's not too long already that we will be leaving 2011. We soon will be saying Good Bye to 2011 and welcoming warmly 2012. Semoga sempat bertemu dengan tahun baru masihi insyaallah. Selalunya kita di awal tahun mesti pasang azam baru kan? Prior to enter the new year, let's revise back for what we have done all this year. For a year to come and go sekarang taklah selambat dulu saya kira. As we grow older, we get busy with life dak? Kalau sesiapa yang bekerja I guess you will have a better understanding of this what we call as Time Constraint. You masuk kerja pagi and paling awal balik mesti petang, or if there is something asking for you to stay back, malam lah jawabnya sampai rumah. All day long itu sahaja kerja. Dengan kerja yang bertimbun-timbun, masa 24 jam tu rasa seperti tak cukup. With the workloads, kita tak perasan pun masa berlalu begitu cepat. How time flies so fast. Year by year we pass through and we are getting older. Dulu muka terik sekarang dah ada kedut2, dulu rambut hitam sekarang ada uban. Let it happens naturally guys. Don't afraid of losing your beauty guys as the beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. Kadang2 makin tua makin cantik orang kata :P

What most important for us to take note is that persediaan menghadapi mati. Harta dunia perlu dicari tapi mengingati mati juga is one thing bro because itu sesuatu benda ynag pasti terjadi. So, let's muhasabah diri masing2 kita selagi masih diberi kesempatan ini :)

For what we know that time and tide wait for no men.

Jangan kita menyesal di kemudian hari sudah :)

UNEXPLAINED.

ASSALAMUALAIKUM WBT.

There are certain things in our lives that can never be interpreted with the senses that we have. Ada, betul ada. Kadang-kadang bila difikirkan menyebabkan rasa kepala pusing. I one had a conversation with my friend not too long ago. Talking about engineering projects and talking about life as well. Sort of. I had been asked by him sepanjang saya hidup ni, ada tak benda yang terlalu sukar untuk saya explainkan. Something hard for you to express and even harder to tell the people. So, I personally said ada lah kut but I forgot what was the thing. So, I asked him back what was yours? Dia bagitahu yang dia selalu fikir bagaimana kita yang celik mata ni nak terangkan sesuatu yang memang tak dapat kita nak beri gambaran lansung dekat mereka yang cacat penglihatan. Contoh, macam mana kita nak bagitahu mereka yang darah tu warna merah? dan merah tu macam mana? I was like I had never go that far tapi it's something fruitful for me to realize that if it was for real, how would you explain to them which is clearly for you to know that it is unexplained by words.

Subhanallah.

It is for us to believe that there are certain things yang kita tak boleh ask for more and something that we cannot question I guess. It's beyond our prediction. The Supreme Power knows better and what is the best untuk hambanya. Tapi just to tell you kalau in that case, we have no answer for that question.

Mereka mungkin kurang pancaindera tapi I know diorang lagi celik hati daripada kita yang celik mata ni. 

To cut short, appreciate your eyes and bersyukurlah denagn nikmat mata yang ada ni.

Tak gitu?